Meet My Friend Mark: He Tells Funny Stories

Mark MacDonald is a friend I met a million years ago working at a ski resort in the Canadian Rockies. Of my friends, it’s easiest to assume that he and I were separated at birth.

I have a few amazing stories he has sent me over the years that I’d like to share. Let’s start with his most recent. It includes every element you could want in a story: suspense, intrigue, and erotic tension.
So I’m at the biggest country bar in Saskatoon where everyone in the place is wearing cowboy hats.

I’m there with Meaghan, Meaghan’s best friend and her husband. We had just come from a Comedy Show where they had carafe’s of Vodka Paralyzers and carafe’s of Caesars for $8 (yes you are reading that right…carafes of both of those…for $8…I watched the bartender pour the shots as i “couldn’t believe it if I didn’t see it for myself” as I told the waitress). We showed up late for the show and the only table left was the table for four directly beside the stage…(so we were basically the only table the comedians could see….I’m sure you know how that ended up…if you didn’t know…comedians, dogs, kids and strippers are just naturally drawn to me for different reasons)

Anyways..back to the story…so I’m trying my best to be on my best behaviour (which was pointless because her best friend smokes, drinks and I think generally likes me…but at that point I was still trying to impress her I guess). So we wind up at this country bar…picture the same clientele as the Palace and a eerily similar layout…except there are no black people, everyone is wearing cowboy hats and there is country music blaring.

I pay the cover for us and check our coats, they let me keep my hat (because again EVERYONE is wearing hats) as that was the only thing I was “worrying” about. I didn’t really care but had been wearing it for about 5 hours…so my hair as shitty as it is would have been epic. That turned out to be the least of my worries….the girl at the coat check tells me I have to check my hoodie as well. No problem right? I thought it was an odd request…what if I had nothing on under it? But whatever..I played by the rules and didn’t really think anything about it. But since when I left the house I had assumed we were going to a random comedy show and wasn’t planning on getting loaded, going bar hopping or going to a country bar this is the T-shirt I was wearing:

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